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Ideas for changing your life

10 Mar

Ok, so, these are ideas for changing my life, but I want to know what changes you’re looking to make, too. Add them in the comments! Though these aren’t all ‘marriage’ changes, I think all of them will benefit my marriage in some way.

Changes I want to make / Things I want to do:

  • Kiss and hug my husband every day.
  • Stay calm, particularly if we start to argue.
  • Walk away from a less-than-calm argument, instead of becoming an emotional trainwreck.
  • Spend 15 minutes a day talking….work, kids, schedules, our relationship, and chores are off-limit topics. It’ll be interesting to see what we talk about.. I feel like all we talk about sometimes are these topics.
  • Put up more pictures of us around the house.
  • Discuss (and write down and post somewhere) our 2 year goal, 5 year goal, 15 year goal, and retirement goals.
  • Have more sex (we’re tired parents of a 7 year old and 15 month old!) I read that the average is 1.5 times a week, so we’re already ahead of the curve, but I’d prefer more if I could actually stay awake!
  • Encourage my husband to get out a little more. He works long days at work, and though we make time for our ‘couple friends,’ he doesn’t get out much for a guy’s evening. I’m thankful for the time he is at home, but wondering if he’d be a little happier if he got out every now and then.
  • Be more positive and less negative. I tend to see the negative side of everything. I’m a realist!
  • Expand our circle of happy  ‘couple’ friends.
  • Have more ‘active’ dates with my husband. We LOVE dining out, but I’d like to try something a little more involved and active. (Any suggestions?)

Any other ideas? What are some things you’d like to change, or even do every day?

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Surrounded by Celebrities

16 Feb

…at least I think I was.

I’m not a huge fan of going out ON Valentine’s Day. It just feels so forced. But last night was Valentine’s Day +1, and I was fine with the reservation my husband made for us.

I was very excited; he took me to the Capital Grille in DC, which I’ve never been to. We’re huge fans of trying new places to dine, so I was excited to head over.

I loved the Capital Grille. It was old-school. Dark wood, dim lighting, and almost pompous in a subdued way (if you can imagine.) It was far from loud and trendy, but even so, it was the place to be. Full of politicians, full of (I’m assuming) lobbyists, but all the ego-stroking was done in a calm and composed manner. I don’t think there was anyone there under the age of thirty.

Being a native New Englander, I had high expectations as I ordered  a three pound Maine lobster My husband had a steak by the likes of which I’ve never seen. Both were delicious.

We were surrounded by well-known people, except I couldn’t place any of them. Cut me some slack; all politicians look the same in dark blue suits!

My husband did a fantastic job choosing this restaurant, and we had a great, relaxing even.

I think I have a new favorite restaurant.

#36: Small steps…like buying your husband a birthday gift

6 Dec

Credit: elevenstitches.com

I had a minor setback. Not with my marriage, really. We haven’t been fighting, things have been good. But since Thanksgiving, things have been just ‘off.’ And for no particular reason, really. I think we just suddenly got very busy.

The business of Thanksgiving (which my dear friend and neighbor hosted) is the start of the crazy holiday season. We watched The Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade while preparing side dishes for Thanksgiving, then we went to our friend’s house where we we ate yummy corn bread, creamy peas (with bacon!), brussels sprouts, mashed potatoes,  mostly done turkey, and amazing dessert! It was an great time.

And then, something happened. It’s been Christmas shopping, shopping for my daughter’s birthday, shopping for my son’s birthday, shopping for my husband’s birthday, preparing for my family’s visit this weekend… The list doesn’t end…

And I think I’ve been out of sync with my husband. Not in any bad way; we haven’t fought, argued, nothing of the sort. We’re just both busy and it’s catching up to us. And since I’ve felt a little ‘off’, I haven’t felt like writing.

But it’s a mistake. It’s a mistake not to write, because that is the POINT of this blog. The point is to work on small things I can do on a DAILY basis for my marriage and for my husband. I’ve been working on the little things, especially when things are good. I work on them especially when things are good because that’s the time when couples tend to relax and not work as hard on their marriage since it’s gliding along so smoothly.

Common sense should tell me that when things are slightly out of sync, that’s probably the time to pick up the pace on my small daily projects, which I have not been doing.

So here I am, getting back on track.

I went and bought my husband his birthday gift. That was partly self serving; it made me feel better about myself, which put me in a better position to start up with my ‘projects’ again. And I think it’s something he’ll really like. He’s been saying over and over again how he needs a new watch; I really wasn’t sure what to get (there are sooooo many choices.)

But on Black Friday, I went to Macy’s and got him this (his has a blue face):

Chronograph watch. Credt: Burberry.com

I think he’s really going to like it.

#31: The obligatory pre-Thanksgiving post: What are you thankful for?

9 Nov

Credit - IKEA.com

What’s a good way to keep track of all the things we’re thankful for as Thanksgiving draws closer? I don’t know, but my friend Mrs. C. emailed me with a great idea.

She passed on a fantastic project from one of our favorite blogs, Young House Love. In today’s blog post, John describes how he and his wife, Sherry, created their own jar for writing about what they’re thankful for. Each day, they’ll write something on a piece of paper that they’re Thankful for, and on Thanksgiving, they’ll read them.

No peeking until Thanksgiving!

I’m going to adapt this project for my family, as well. This weekend on a trip to IKEA, I bought several glass jars, one of which is still empty and will do the trick (see picture above.)

I will not be etching the glass as John and Sherry did, as I’m not that creative, and I’d probably etch right through our counters. Better to not ruin my apartment.

I think my husband will play along, as he’s all about building family traditions as of lately. This could be a good one.

Here’s YHL’s finished jar:

 

Credit: YoungHouseLove.com

So now I have to get thinking… what am I thankful for? There’s lots that I’m thankful for; that we both have jobs, that we’re all healthy, etc, but I’d like to find more specific examples of smaller things I’m thankful for as well.

What are you thankful for?

Updates: I had every intention of doing this, but life sort of got in the way. There’s always next year.

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